Stories from 2010: Natalie Jewel

TC was the best thing that happened to me in 2010 - there is no doubt about that.

But the greatest joy that was brought to my life in 2010, is being delivered to me by TC in 2011.  For those of you who don't know, TC and I are having a baby girl sometime this summer - she's due July 2nd.

I know what you're thinking, and yes, we've been together for less than a year.

TC and I didn't plan this, it just sort of.........happened.

It's funny because TC didn't want to have children.  And with 3 kids in my stable already, I didn't really want to have anymore either.  In fact, I had been to see my family doctor about getting a vasectomy and had been referred to a urologist.  Alas, before the urologist could do his best work, I did my best work.

So, rather than get the "procedure" done, I just got TC pregnant instead!!  There is nothing I won't do to get out of a medical procedure!!

I'm teasing of course, but even though TC and I didn't want or plan to have a baby, we are thrilled none the less.

I love being a father.  My 3 children have brought so much joy to my life (mostly) and I wouldn't be who I am today without them.

My only regret is that I have not been able to raise them.  Don't get me wrong, I am still a part of their lives, and I'd like to think a big part, but I'm not there on a day to day basis.

I desperately wanted that - I never wanted to be a "weekend Dad".

And now, thanks to TC, I will have the chance to be an everyday Dad!

We've already picked a name for our little girl - Natalie Jewel.  While we were initially convinced we were having a boy, it's probably for the best that we're not - he would have been named Andre the Giant.

I'm teasing.  Again.

I can't thank TC enough.  Making me a father again is the greatest gift she could have ever given me.  It's the greatest joy she will bring to my life.

My promise to TC is this - I will always be a good Daddy.  I will love Natalie with all my heart.  I will bath her.  I will change her diapers.  I will get up in the middle of the night and feed her.  I will kiss her boo-boo's better.  I will do her hair.  I will let you fix her hair after I've done it.  I will read her stories.  I will have tea parties with her.  I will take her to soccer practice, or dance class, or swimming lessons, or hockey.  I will help her with her homework.  I will teach her to dream big.  I will teach her right from wrong.  I will teach her to stand up for herself.  I will teach her to be confident.  I will teach her to help others.  I will teach her how to say no when boys ask her out.  I will let her know that she can always count on her Daddy.

I read somewhere once that the greatest gift a father can give his child is to love their mother.  If that is true, then Natalie will receive that greatest gift everyday of her life.  After all, I have to set a good example her, so that she grows up knowing what true love really is.

Stories from 2010: The Mini-Meanie & Bon Jovi

Bon Jovi rocked the Air Canada Centre in Toronto last week, and it inspired the latest Story from 2010.  Last July the Mini-Meanie and I saw them play at the Rogers Centre, and this is my Screaming Review.

The first thing you need to understand, is that Bon Jovi is my absolute favourite band.  However, until last July, I'd never seen them play live!  I know, how crazy is that??  It just seemed like whenever they came to Toronto, it was the absolute worst time and I simply didn't have the money to go (yes, I'm the "down-on-his-luck" guy that Bon Jovi seems very fond of singing about).  However, thanks to a very generous Christmas gift, my luck was about to change.

I took my teenage son (The Mini-Meanie) with me to the concert - I felt it was only fair since I took my daughter to see Daughtry, and The Mini-Meanie and I had to skip the Jays home opener last year as fallout from the 24 Hours of Hell.

Kid Rock was the opening act, however we didn't get into Toronto on time to see him so I can't really comment on his performance.  Actually, we did get into Toronto on time, however traffic and parking was a nightmare so it would be more accurate to say that we didn't get to the stadium on time to see Kid Rock.  And I'm not complaining, just explainin'.

When Bon Jovi hit the stage at 9:00pm, it was a magical moment for us.  Here we are, Father and Son, Screaming Meanie and Mini-Meanie, and our favourite band in the world is right there in front of us.  Actually, I suppose Bon Jovi is the Mini-Meanie's second favourite band (he still likes David Cook best - although technically David Cook isn't a really a "band", so I suppose we're back to Bon Jovi being his favourite?).

I digress....

Even at my age, I have to admit, I was starstruck!  Finally, after 25 long years, I was finally seeing my favourite band live in concert!

They opened with Blood on Blood from their album New Jersey.  It was a wee bit of an odd choice I thought since it wasn't really a big hit for them, nor is it the kind of song that really pumps you up.  But really, who cares, Bon Freakin' Jovi was on the stage!  They followed that up with We Weren't Born to Follow off of their recently released CD 'The Circle'.

After that, they blew the roof off the dome when they played You Give Love a Bad Name!  It's still my favourite Jovi song, and the Mini-Meanie and I were loving every second of it!

The party continued with Born to Be My Baby and the country-ish Lost Highway, before they blew the roof off the place AGAIN playing Runaway and It's My Life.  I was actually surprised how many of the 50,000 in attendance knew the song Runaway - and it was awesome!

Kid Rock joined Bon Jovi on stage to perform Old Time Rock n' Roll - even though I think the song is completely overplayed, and I'm not a fan of Kid Rock (at all), it was actually a pretty cool moment.

The Stage set up was very cool.  The lights were mounted on a semi-circle above the stage, while the inside of the semi-circle served as a giant video screen - which was great since our seats were so far back.

If I had one complaint, it would have to be our crappy seats - floor seats aren't as cool as they sound.  Not when Andre the Giant is standing in front of you and you're about 40 rows from the stage.  When you have 6th row seats, as I did for Def Leppard in 1988, then floor seats are uber cool!

Ok, I actually have a second complaint.  Would it have killed the folks at the Rogers Centre to either open the roof, or turn on the air conditioning??  Look, I'm no rocket scientist, but it's the middle of summer, and you've crammed 50,000 people into a stadium, do you think it might get a wee bit hot???  The Mini-Meanie and I were sweatin' like hookers in church!

In fact, at one point during the show, a woman in front of us collapsed!  I felt bad for her as I could see early on during the concert that she was struggling.  When her and her husband/boyfriend finally made the decision to leave, it was too late - down she went.  I was disappointed at how long it took the paramedics to arrive, but once there, they did a great job taking care of her.  It was more than a little ironic that the woman collapsed while Bon Jovi was performing, Something for the Pain!  Hey, I can't make this stuff up folks.

The other thing that bothered me was the sound (ok, so it's 3 complaints - sue me).  This was the first time I'd ever seen a concert at Rogers Centre and if you've never been, the acoustics suck!  The sound was bouncing off every corner of the concrete jungle.  It was a big disappointment, but not enough that I didn't enjoy it.

Am I allowed one more wee complaint???  Of course I am - it's my blog!!  They didn't play anything from their album Bounce.  In my humble opinion, Bounce is probably their most underrated album.

During the encore they played Always, their mega-hit Wanted Dead or Alive and then finished off the night with a rousing rendition of Living on a Prayer.  You haven't lived until you've heard 50,000 people sing an acupella version of the song.  It was nothing short of incredible and I'm man enough to say, it gave me giant goosebumps!

After more than 25 years of performances, it's not surprising that Bon Jovi knows how to entertain a crowd.  He certainly sent the Mini-Meanie and I home very happy!

Setlist

1. Blood on Blood

2. We Weren’t Born to Follow

3. You Give Love a Bad Name
4. Born to Be My Baby
5. Lost Highway
6. Runaway
7. It’s My Life
8. I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead
9. We Got It Goin’ On
10. Bad Medicine/Old Time Rock & Roll/Shout (with Kid Rock)
11. Love’s the Only Rule
12. Lay Your Hands on Me (Richie on lead vocals)
13. Bed of Roses
14. I’ll Be There For You
15. Something for the Pain
16. Someday I’ll Be Saturday Night
17. In These Arms
18. Work for the Working Man
19. Have a Nice Day
20. Who Says You Can’t Go Home
21. Keep the Faith

Encore:
22. Always
23. Wanted Dead or Alive
24. Livin’ on a Prayer

Stories from 2010: Doc

Most of the really good stuff that happened in 2010 happened in the second half.

For example, in October, I moved in with TC.  And anyone who is anyone knows that when you move in with a girl, you have to celebrate!  Who are TC and I to thumb our noses at tradition?   So, how did we celebrate??  We got a puppy of course!!

But not just any puppy.  We researched, and researched, and researched to make sure we'd find the perfect puppy.  Well, mostly it was TC doing the research - but I did a TON of listening!

I wanted a BIG man size dog, while TC wanted a little bite sized dog.  We compromised and decided we'd go with a mid-size model - a Cockapoo.  Technically, the Cockapoo is a little on the small size, but what can I say, TC has this look she gives me that is irresistible - I sigh, then I curse, then I give in.  What are you gonna do?

I digress.  If you have a dog, then you already know that the hardest thing about getting a new puppy is picking the perfect name.  TC and I are both big Blue Jay fans, but somehow "Roy Halladay" seemed like a completely inappropriate name for a dog.  So we gave him Halladay's nickname - Doc!





Doc-a-poo the Cockapoo!  Clever, I know.

Aside from the occasional accident in the house Doc has been a great pet.  And by "occasional" I mean, "almost every fricken' day"!! 

Yes, house breaking this beast of an animal has been our biggest challenge.  Why relieve yourself outside in the cold when you can hold it and go in the comfort of a nice warm house??  When people ask me what kind of dog he is, I tell them he's a "Cockapoo-all-over-the-house"!!

But even though I want to kill him half the time - he really is my bestest animal bud!  I've loved animals before, but I didn't think it was possible to love a dog this much.

He loves loves loves TC.  It doesn't matter where she is, he has to lay on her!  He loves her lap, her legs, the crook of her arm, heck, he even lays on her head sometimes!  And a woman with a puppy on her head is damn sexy!

But, he does love me too - he follows me around like, well, like a puppy dog.  He freaks out every time I leave the house, and while he'll lay beside me on the couch, or right at my feet - he won't lay on my lap the way he does with TC.  I was kind of getting a little self conscious about it, but then we learned it's a dominance thing - he views me as the Alpha Male.

That's right bitches.....I'm the Alpha Freakin' Male!  Mwuahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa! 

What can I say about the little guy?  Yes he has his faults, but we take the sweet with the sour.  He's a member of our family now, and he'll be with us for the rest of his life.  Getting this tiny puppy as TC calls him, was the best way we ever could have celebrated moving in together!

Stories from 2010: Boy Meets Girl

2010 was an up and down year for me.  Of course, you've already read about 3 of the lowest moments from last year - now, you get to read about the highlight!

2010 was the year I met "The One".  Or as she is known to her co-workers, "TC".  I will need to come up with a nickname for her in my blogs, but for now, we'll just go with TC.

So, how do I know she's The One??  Well, when you know, you just know.  Right from our first date, walking along the beach eating ice-cream (I know, total cliche), I knew TC was a special woman.

First, she was willing to start seeing me even though I was unemployed at the time.  I think most women tend to run from an unemployed bum guy, but not TC.  I kind of figured she just couldn't resist me.  I mean, c'mon , it's ME for cryin' out loud - job or no job, I'm friggin' irresistible!  Excuse me while I pull my tongue out of my cheek.

However, as it turns out, TC simply doesn't judge people by their circumstances which is one of the things I love about her.

However, you probably want to know how it all started so that you know how you can find your own Screaming Meanie and/or TC.  Well, our passionate love affair began with baseball.  Yes, baseball!

I manage a co-ed baseball team, and after our 2009 season, 6 of the 7 girls on my ball team weren't coming back - some couldn't return, others just weren't being invited back.

Anyway, I put out a call for new teammates, and TC's sister (who I went to high school with) said her and her husband (who is now her ex-husband) wanted to play.  A short time later she messaged me and said her sister wanted to play too.

That kind of surprised me.

I didn't know TC in high school - the year she started grade 9 was the year I was graduating grade 12.  However, over the years, I had seen her hanging around her sister's Facebook profile and I was certain she had spotted me there once or twice too.

Not long after spotting her on Facebook, I had run into TC a couple of times at Tim Horton's and introduced myself as her sister's friend.  She was......underwhelmed.  In fact, it almost felt like she was seriously annoyed that I was pointing out our almost-kinda-sorta-relationship-by-association.

So yes, I was a wee bit surprised that she wanted to play on my baseball team.  After all, she didn't really like me.  Right?

However, after she registered to be on the team we became Facebook friends, and as you know, you're not really friends with anybody until you're friends with them on Facebook.  So, ergo, we were almost best buds.  Practically.  Sort of.

The very first thing that struck me, was how much she talked about baseball on her profile!!  Players, teams, games, strategies......this wasn't someone who was a casual fan.....TC was hardcore about her Blue Jays!

She was at the Jays home opener and she posted pictures.  I nervously posted comments.  Nervous because even though we were Facebook friends, I still wasn't sure if she liked me, or if she just added me in order to get a better spot in the batting order.  I certainly didn't want to annoy her any further, but a girl who likes baseball - how do I stumble across an opportunity like this and not take a shot?

So we conversed for a wee bit via Facebook, commenting on pics, status updates etc.

And then, the season started.

Let me tell you, I had no idea, but TC is the Babe Ruth of co-ed baseball!!  By "Babe" I mean she is freaking hot, and by "Ruth" I mean..........SHE IS FREAKING HOT!

During one of our games, her sister casually dropped the bomb - TC recently became single!!  The problem was, the guy she had just dumped was unemployed.  Yikes!  There was no way TC was going to want to get involved with another unemployed bum guy was there??  Probably not.  But.......

I increased the amount of Facebook conversations I was having with TC.  We flirted, we talked baseball, and we talked about my job search.  In fact, I was updating her constantly on my job interviews, prospects and results.  I wanted her to know that I wasn't an unemployed bum, I was simply a victim of bad circumstances.  Circumstances, that I was proactively looking to change.

So after lengthy discussions about baseball, kids, past relationships and Star Wars (oh yeah, in addition to baseball, TC loves Star Wars too!), I slyly let her know that if I had a job, I would love to take her out on a date.  TC sent me the following message.......

Well now that you know everything there is to know about me we'll have to go out lol. So hurry up and get a job...although apparently that doesn't matter to me hahaha. Just remember I'm a low maintenance girl. I don't need much.

Since I'm a strong manly man I don't mind admitting the following - my heart soared!!  I think I may have jumped around like a lovestruck teenage girl.....but there's a chance that might have just been gas.

And with that, our first date was set - ice cream and a walk along the beach.  I wish I could have done a nice dinner, however, being unemployed, my budget didn't allow for it.

Since that first date, we haven't looked back!  From the start we were seeing each other almost every day and very quickly we fell madly in love.  And it's not just me - my family adores her!  My kids love her, my Mom thinks the world of her, and my brother and sister really think I've hit a homerun with TC.  I agree.

I love that I can be myself around TC.  I don't have to be perfect all the time, she accepts my flaws and embraces them.  I can be silly when I want (which is often), lazy if I need to be, when I'm grumpy she tries to cheer me up, and she is very liberal in doling out affection.

The thing I love most about TC (not counting any of the dirty stuff) is that she makes me laugh every day.  And that's not just talk, or an exaggeration, she literally says or does something every single day that makes me laugh hysterically!

She's my lover, my friend, and my muse. She supports every crazy whim I have and I feel there's nothing I can't accomplish with TC by my side.  I'm truly becoming a better man because of her.

I really have struck gold with her.  I can't imagine my life without her in it, nor do I want to.  We now live together and are in the process of purchasing a house.  Things are quickly getting very for exciting for us, and I can't wait to share every adventure, every challenge, and every waking moment with her.  I love her to death, and sometimes, I still have to pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming.

 

Stories from 2010: 24 Hours of Hell

I have a few stories to share from 2010, and since I don't really feel like posting one of those lame "2010 review" narratives, you're going to get them individually in easy to chew bite size pieces.  And really, each of the tales deserves their own post anyway, so, buckle up and enjoy the first entry!

The first of these such posts goes back to March 15th-16th of 2010.  A period of time I like to call - 24 Hours of Hell!

March 15th - You're Fired!

Losing a job is never easy.  Losing a job you love is downright devastating!  And that, is exactly the event that started my 24 Hours of Hell.

Working out of a satellite office, I was in charge of sales for a local IT company.  I worked with great people (in my opinion the best in the industry) and really enjoyed my work.  The President of the company was someone who I admired greatly, and to this day is the best person I have ever worked for.  Anyone, myself included, that worked for him, would have stood in traffic for him - he was that good!

Yes, it was a little odd seeing him in our office on a Monday morning, but I had no reason to suspect that anything was amiss.  That is, until he and the owner of the company strolled into my office. 

I knew immediately what was going on.  I had been downsized once before, and when you're immediate manager AND the HR Manager and/or owner show up in your office, it's not good news.

I was told the company wanted to try a new approach to sales, to go in a "different" direction.

Look, I'm not stupid, I knew what was going on.  Sales weren't where they should have been.  I was not the sales rock star that I had been in the past.  I was representing a premium product that was designed to improve quality of service, and ease IT pains. 

However, premium service comes with a premium price tag - and I joined the company just a few months before the recession hit.  So I was trying to convince companies to increase their IT expenditures in an environment when most companies were looking to cut costs.

It wasn't an impossible task, as I did have a lot of success, but it was certainly a difficult task.

And in the end, it cost me a job that I loved dearly.

I packed up my things, said goodbye to a few people, and sat in my car for what seemed like hours - I was numb from the shock.

The company, first class right to the end, sent me away with a nice parting gift, and gave me a glowing recommendation.  It still sucked losing that job, but they honestly did what they could take away the bitter sting of pain.

I miss the whole gang.

March 16th - The Gold Digger

Ever dated someone, and thought that they seemed pretty nice, only to find out that they weren't the person you thought they were??  Of course, we all have.  What sucks is that I always thought I was a better judge of character than that!

To keep a long story short, I had dated a girl we'll call, mmmmmmm, The Gold Digger a few years back.  She was a single Mom of 4 kids (yeah, I know), and things were going fairly well.  That is until the ex-Future Mrs. Meanie had one of her many "epiphanies" and I went running back like a puppy dog.  Fast forward a few years, and The Gold Digger tracks me down on Facebook.  We hooked up again, went out a few times, and everything seemed to be going well yet again.

On the day I lost my job, she texted me and told me her kids would be with their Dad for one more night, and suggested I should go over to her house.  What am I gonna say, no??  So, the plans were set.  Until, I lost my job.  I'm sure you'll appreciate that I wasn't really in a hang out and make small talk kind of mood, so I begged out of our date.

The next morning I get a message on Facebook from her that says she's sorry, but she can't get involved with anyone because she's still not over the death of her Father (who had passed away 18 months before this).

Say what?!??

So let's see, we have a single Mom of 4 kids, who doesn't work, who's only source of income is child support, she finds me, I have a good job, and she thinks, ka-ching!  And the day after her new source of income loses his job, she cuts bait??

Hey, I'm not mad that she did it (it was way too early for me to form any kind of emotional attachment to her), I just couldn't believe how transparent she was about it!  Plus, it does make the whole 24 Hours of Hell story all that much better tell!

So now I've lost a job, and I've lost a girl!  What else could possibly go wrong??  Read on my friends...... 

March 16th - Go Directly to Jail, Maybe

If you're family is anything like mine, you all get along, you all love each other, and you all look out for one another.  Mostly.

And, you have a Black Sheep in your family.

On this day, the Black Sheep in our family was in rare form.

She came to the house itchin' to pick a fight with my Mother.  And how do I know this?  Because the Good Sister also happened to be at the house for a wee visit and Black Sheep Sister admitted it to her!  The problem was, the Black Sheep Sister didn't know I was home (she was unaware that I had lost my job).

You see, in my family, everyone is afraid of the Black Sheep Sister.  Everyone except me that is - C'mon, I'm the Screaming Frickin' Meanie, I'm not afraid of anything, except maybe the dentist.....but I'm working on that.

Anyway, the Black Sheep Sister is loud, obnoxious, and will yell, scream and/or cause a scene to get what she wants - and yes, she's a grown up......ish.  Plus, she's a master of the guilt trips.  However, I am immune to her tantrums.

She had stopped in to ask my Mother to babysit her kids on the weekend knowing full well that my Mom couldn't.  And that's when all hell broke loose.

Of course, being the superhero in the house, I immediately sprung into action!  I asked her to leave.  She refused.  Then she started getting all up in my grill about being a "Mama's boy".  Yeah, I just worked "all up in my grill" into a blog post and it felt freaking awesome!!

I knocked a coffee cup out of her hand, she retrieved it, and before throwing it at me, she rolled up the rim just to make sure she wasn't throwing away a winner (it was during the "Roll up to Win" campaign at Tim Horton's).

I then grabbed her sunglasses and threw them to the end of the lawn and told her to get lost.  I know that wasn't very mature, but it seemed like a better idea than wrestling my sister off the property. 

She tossed a few more colourful metaphors my way, got in her car, and left.

I thought that was the end of another lively episode with The Black Sheep.  She'd bitch and moan about how no one in the family loves her, and nobody cares enough to help her out, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

And then, the police show up at my door!!  My sister wanted to charge me with assault!

I know, my own God Damn sister wants to send me to jail.

It seems that she told the cops that I took her to the ground and was beating on her and the only reason I stopped was because my 12-year old nephew pulled me off!!

Are you kidding me?!?  Really??  Was I being punk'd??  Is that show even still on??

My sister has made up some creative lies in her life - but this one takes the cake!  How in the name of the baby Jesus did she ever think she would get away this fabricated tale??  My Mom and the Good Sister were standing right there and saw the whole thing!  Or should I say the whole nothing??

Well, the officers believed our side of the story as they didn't take me away in cuffs, but, that doesn't seem to matter to the Black Sheep Sister who will tell anyone who listen that her big brother beat the crap out of her.

*sigh*

I wonder what convinced the cops that I was telling the truth.  Was it the corroborating account that my Mom and the Good Sister gave?  Was it the fact that there were no marks or bruises anywhere on the Black Sheep Sister??  Or was it the ludicrous tale that her 90lb son pulled her enraged 250lb brother off of her??

I'm not sure, but let that be a lesson to everyone out there, if you're going to try to charge someone with assault, make sure they actually, you know, assault you.

When the cops left, I wasn't just closing the door behind them, I was closing the door on a very eventful 24 hours that will forever be known as, The 24 Hours of Hell.