Stories from 2010: Natalie Jewel

TC was the best thing that happened to me in 2010 - there is no doubt about that.

But the greatest joy that was brought to my life in 2010, is being delivered to me by TC in 2011.  For those of you who don't know, TC and I are having a baby girl sometime this summer - she's due July 2nd.

I know what you're thinking, and yes, we've been together for less than a year.

TC and I didn't plan this, it just sort of.........happened.

It's funny because TC didn't want to have children.  And with 3 kids in my stable already, I didn't really want to have anymore either.  In fact, I had been to see my family doctor about getting a vasectomy and had been referred to a urologist.  Alas, before the urologist could do his best work, I did my best work.

So, rather than get the "procedure" done, I just got TC pregnant instead!!  There is nothing I won't do to get out of a medical procedure!!

I'm teasing of course, but even though TC and I didn't want or plan to have a baby, we are thrilled none the less.

I love being a father.  My 3 children have brought so much joy to my life (mostly) and I wouldn't be who I am today without them.

My only regret is that I have not been able to raise them.  Don't get me wrong, I am still a part of their lives, and I'd like to think a big part, but I'm not there on a day to day basis.

I desperately wanted that - I never wanted to be a "weekend Dad".

And now, thanks to TC, I will have the chance to be an everyday Dad!

We've already picked a name for our little girl - Natalie Jewel.  While we were initially convinced we were having a boy, it's probably for the best that we're not - he would have been named Andre the Giant.

I'm teasing.  Again.

I can't thank TC enough.  Making me a father again is the greatest gift she could have ever given me.  It's the greatest joy she will bring to my life.

My promise to TC is this - I will always be a good Daddy.  I will love Natalie with all my heart.  I will bath her.  I will change her diapers.  I will get up in the middle of the night and feed her.  I will kiss her boo-boo's better.  I will do her hair.  I will let you fix her hair after I've done it.  I will read her stories.  I will have tea parties with her.  I will take her to soccer practice, or dance class, or swimming lessons, or hockey.  I will help her with her homework.  I will teach her to dream big.  I will teach her right from wrong.  I will teach her to stand up for herself.  I will teach her to be confident.  I will teach her to help others.  I will teach her how to say no when boys ask her out.  I will let her know that she can always count on her Daddy.

I read somewhere once that the greatest gift a father can give his child is to love their mother.  If that is true, then Natalie will receive that greatest gift everyday of her life.  After all, I have to set a good example her, so that she grows up knowing what true love really is.

The Football Player and The Cheerleader

Once upon a time there was a Football Player.  He was a giant!  He was strong and determined, yet kind and gentle.

And then there was a Cheerleader.  She was beautiful and smart.  Caring and trusting.

The Football Player lived an extraordinary life, hobnobbing with professional athletes and rockstars before he finally settled into a life in business.

The Cheerleader travelled a more traditional path, choosing to raise a beautiful family instead.

Although the Football player was a Giant, and the Cheerleader was tiny, they had more in common than they ever would have known.

While The Football Player had lead an exciting life, and The Cheerleader's family provided her more love than any one person would ever need - eternal happiness had eluded them both.

 

This is not to suggest that either The Football Player or The Cheerleader were unhappy, simply that they were unfulfilled.

 

The Football player had been married twice - and had tried desperately to make his marriages work.  The first couldn't survive the ocean that separated them.  The second didn't survive her extra-marital affair.

The Cheerleader had also been married twice - and she too worked tirelessly in vain to honour her vows.  But her first husband was a drunk, and her second husband was a liar.

Both The Football Player and The Cheerleader became champions of lost causes, working diligently to rescue and fix the hopeless lovers losers who had crossed their paths.

It was frustrating, and painful for their friends and families to watch them continually spiral into an abyss of despair.

That is until the day hope arrived at their doorsteps in the form of a man.

This man, some may even say a hero, was ready to rescue these two hapless souls.  He was ready redirect their life's journey, and put it on a path to redemption.

Tonight, The Football Player and The Cheerleader will meet for the first time.  Tonight, a fresh new seed of love will be planted. 

Over the coming week's, this seed will grow roots, and a new love will bloom.  This love will be stronger and more beautiful than either of them have ever experienced or could have imagined.

Starting tonight, The Football Player and The Cheerleader will experience love as it should be - exciting and wonderful, beautiful and breathtaking.  It will be a fairy tale love.

They will live Happily Ever After.

Stories from 2010: The Mini-Meanie & Bon Jovi

Bon Jovi rocked the Air Canada Centre in Toronto last week, and it inspired the latest Story from 2010.  Last July the Mini-Meanie and I saw them play at the Rogers Centre, and this is my Screaming Review.

The first thing you need to understand, is that Bon Jovi is my absolute favourite band.  However, until last July, I'd never seen them play live!  I know, how crazy is that??  It just seemed like whenever they came to Toronto, it was the absolute worst time and I simply didn't have the money to go (yes, I'm the "down-on-his-luck" guy that Bon Jovi seems very fond of singing about).  However, thanks to a very generous Christmas gift, my luck was about to change.

I took my teenage son (The Mini-Meanie) with me to the concert - I felt it was only fair since I took my daughter to see Daughtry, and The Mini-Meanie and I had to skip the Jays home opener last year as fallout from the 24 Hours of Hell.

Kid Rock was the opening act, however we didn't get into Toronto on time to see him so I can't really comment on his performance.  Actually, we did get into Toronto on time, however traffic and parking was a nightmare so it would be more accurate to say that we didn't get to the stadium on time to see Kid Rock.  And I'm not complaining, just explainin'.

When Bon Jovi hit the stage at 9:00pm, it was a magical moment for us.  Here we are, Father and Son, Screaming Meanie and Mini-Meanie, and our favourite band in the world is right there in front of us.  Actually, I suppose Bon Jovi is the Mini-Meanie's second favourite band (he still likes David Cook best - although technically David Cook isn't a really a "band", so I suppose we're back to Bon Jovi being his favourite?).

I digress....

Even at my age, I have to admit, I was starstruck!  Finally, after 25 long years, I was finally seeing my favourite band live in concert!

They opened with Blood on Blood from their album New Jersey.  It was a wee bit of an odd choice I thought since it wasn't really a big hit for them, nor is it the kind of song that really pumps you up.  But really, who cares, Bon Freakin' Jovi was on the stage!  They followed that up with We Weren't Born to Follow off of their recently released CD 'The Circle'.

After that, they blew the roof off the dome when they played You Give Love a Bad Name!  It's still my favourite Jovi song, and the Mini-Meanie and I were loving every second of it!

The party continued with Born to Be My Baby and the country-ish Lost Highway, before they blew the roof off the place AGAIN playing Runaway and It's My Life.  I was actually surprised how many of the 50,000 in attendance knew the song Runaway - and it was awesome!

Kid Rock joined Bon Jovi on stage to perform Old Time Rock n' Roll - even though I think the song is completely overplayed, and I'm not a fan of Kid Rock (at all), it was actually a pretty cool moment.

The Stage set up was very cool.  The lights were mounted on a semi-circle above the stage, while the inside of the semi-circle served as a giant video screen - which was great since our seats were so far back.

If I had one complaint, it would have to be our crappy seats - floor seats aren't as cool as they sound.  Not when Andre the Giant is standing in front of you and you're about 40 rows from the stage.  When you have 6th row seats, as I did for Def Leppard in 1988, then floor seats are uber cool!

Ok, I actually have a second complaint.  Would it have killed the folks at the Rogers Centre to either open the roof, or turn on the air conditioning??  Look, I'm no rocket scientist, but it's the middle of summer, and you've crammed 50,000 people into a stadium, do you think it might get a wee bit hot???  The Mini-Meanie and I were sweatin' like hookers in church!

In fact, at one point during the show, a woman in front of us collapsed!  I felt bad for her as I could see early on during the concert that she was struggling.  When her and her husband/boyfriend finally made the decision to leave, it was too late - down she went.  I was disappointed at how long it took the paramedics to arrive, but once there, they did a great job taking care of her.  It was more than a little ironic that the woman collapsed while Bon Jovi was performing, Something for the Pain!  Hey, I can't make this stuff up folks.

The other thing that bothered me was the sound (ok, so it's 3 complaints - sue me).  This was the first time I'd ever seen a concert at Rogers Centre and if you've never been, the acoustics suck!  The sound was bouncing off every corner of the concrete jungle.  It was a big disappointment, but not enough that I didn't enjoy it.

Am I allowed one more wee complaint???  Of course I am - it's my blog!!  They didn't play anything from their album Bounce.  In my humble opinion, Bounce is probably their most underrated album.

During the encore they played Always, their mega-hit Wanted Dead or Alive and then finished off the night with a rousing rendition of Living on a Prayer.  You haven't lived until you've heard 50,000 people sing an acupella version of the song.  It was nothing short of incredible and I'm man enough to say, it gave me giant goosebumps!

After more than 25 years of performances, it's not surprising that Bon Jovi knows how to entertain a crowd.  He certainly sent the Mini-Meanie and I home very happy!

Setlist

1. Blood on Blood

2. We Weren’t Born to Follow

3. You Give Love a Bad Name
4. Born to Be My Baby
5. Lost Highway
6. Runaway
7. It’s My Life
8. I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead
9. We Got It Goin’ On
10. Bad Medicine/Old Time Rock & Roll/Shout (with Kid Rock)
11. Love’s the Only Rule
12. Lay Your Hands on Me (Richie on lead vocals)
13. Bed of Roses
14. I’ll Be There For You
15. Something for the Pain
16. Someday I’ll Be Saturday Night
17. In These Arms
18. Work for the Working Man
19. Have a Nice Day
20. Who Says You Can’t Go Home
21. Keep the Faith

Encore:
22. Always
23. Wanted Dead or Alive
24. Livin’ on a Prayer

My Mother's Racist Animals

My Mother has 3 animals at home - a little black poodle, a little black cat, and a blonde goldendoodle (who is a MONSTER sized dog).

She started out with Jake, the little black poodle.  There are no two ways around it, Jake was (and still is) a little spoiled puppy.

After my Mom and I got a house together, the kids and I decided we would surprise her with a kitten.  And surprise her we did!  We went to our local SPCA and adopted a little black kitten named Jynx.

To our surprise, Jake and Jynx instantly bonded.  They ate together, they slept together, and they played together.  They were inseparable. 

The two of them would have their crazy hour (usually in the evening) and chase each other all over the house!  And it wasn't a one way relationship - they would take turns being the chaser and the chasee.  Yep, they were bestest buds!

And then, we introduced Jack into the fold.  Jack was my idea.  A number of years ago I dated a woman who had a goldendoodle.  After the relationship fizzled, I found myself missing her terribly - the dog that is, not the woman.

So, with my heart still longing for a goldendoodle of my own, my Mom and I decided to adopt one - we named him Jack.

Crazy hour was about to get crazier!  Except, Jake and Jynx didn't take to Jack at all (I know, I know, Jack, Jake and Jynx - what can I say, we weren't really thinking). 

All Jack wanted to do was play with the little black puppy and kitty.  But they wanted nothing to do with him.  It was actually kind of surprising because when we would take Jake for a walk, he wanted to greet and play with every dog he came across.  We thought adding another playmate in the house would have been a dream come true.

Wrongo!

Poor Jack.

When my Mom and I broke up (it was an amicable break up), and TC and I moved in together, we adopted Doc, a tiny little blonde cockapoo.

Now, we thought perhaps the reason Jake and Jynx didn't want to play with Jack is because they were intimidated by his sheer size.  However, when we visit my mom, we often bring Doc with us, and they don't want to play with him either!

Doc and Jack desperately try to include Jake and Jynx in their rowdy animal play, but it's a fruitless effort, the two little black animals have zero interest.

It's not that Jake and Jynx don't want to play, I mean, they still love to play with each other. 

There can only be one explanation for this - Jake and Jynx are racist.  That's right, racist.  They simply aren't interested in playing with the white animals! 

Buggers.

Screaming Confession #4

I love Glee.

Yeah, you read that right.  I freakin' love Glee!

I'm still a manly man, I love sports, action movies,  and naked women.  I leave my socks on the floor, the toilet seat up, and my dirty dishes on the counter.  But yes, I still love Glee.

It kind of happened by accident, and of course, for the noblest of reasons.

My son, who hopes to one day become a famous actor (but what he really wants to do is direct - no joke), was starring in a play last summer.  Of course, that play was Glee.   So, TC and I took the afternoon off and went to watch his performance.

At one point early in the play, TC exclaimed, "Oh my God, he's Finn!", to which I replied, "Is that good?".  Finn, as I would find out, is the main character on the show.

The production was pieced together with scenes from several different episodes of the show.  Over and over TC kept saying, "Oh I've seen that episode".

As an aside, it was a proud moment for a Father seeing his son up on stage entertaining millions, errrr, I mean hundreds.....ish of theater goers. 

But naturally I was curious.  I wanted to see who this Finn was, and I wanted to see some of the scenes that my son was portraying on stage.

So, TC and I rented season 1 of Glee.  I was somewhat enjoying the first episode, but when they performed Don't Stop Believing at the end of the episode, I was hooked!  One measly episode in, and I officially became a "Gleek".

TC and I plowed through the entire first season in less than a week.  And we've continued to watch the second season.

For any men out there that may be scoffing at this Screaming Confession, I have two words for you, Santana and Brittany.  Oh, and Sue Sylvester is a frickin' riot!!

5 Things I Learned Watching the Superbowl Half Time Show

1. The Black Eyed Peas have a TON of great songs.  I can't say that I'm an avid fan of the group, but damn, the really do have some good songs.

2.  Fergie is bloody awful live.  I honestly had to check to make sure my ears weren't bleeding after listening to her sing.  Or wail.  Or whatever it was she was doing with her voice.

3.  Usher is almost as bad as Fergie.  Dude can't sing!  But, at least he can dance.

4.  Auto Tune may be the worst thing that has ever happened to music.  Just sayin'.

5.  Slash is still the coolest Mother F#@%&R in Rock n' Roll

So, what did you think of the half time show?